Book a bay, sit on the bench, ride away dry

Exactly what it says. Fifteen minutes is fifteen minutes, and the bench is full of people whose slot is next, so running over is not a kindness to anybody.

If your bike needs longer we tell you when you roll in and offer you the next thing up, or a slot later the same session. We would rather turn a wash into a detail at the entrance than surprise you at the bench.

Ten minutes of grace, then the bay goes to whoever is waiting. There is almost always somebody waiting.

We will fit you in later the same session if there is a gap, at no extra charge. Telephone rather than ride over, and we will tell you honestly whether it is worth coming.

Yes, and most people do. There is a bench with a roof over it facing all four bays and a fan on it.

What we ask is that you stay on the bench rather than in the bay. A pressure lance at working pressure will take skin off, and the floor is wet and soapy by design.

Not the way we use it. The lance never comes closer than a hand span, never points up into the underside, and never goes near a bearing, a cable end, a switch housing or the chain. Those areas are washed by hand.

This is the main reason a wash here takes longer than at a roadside round. If your switches have started sticking or a bearing has started grumbling after a cheap wash, that is usually what happened.

Surface rust, yes, and often completely. Pitting that has gone through the plating, no, and nothing anybody sells will bring that back.

We walk round the bike with you before quoting and point at which is which. About one bike in five is told to spend the money on parts instead, and that advice costs nothing.

One punch for every paid visit, whatever you booked. Ten punches on the same bike earns a free wash, dry and chain clean.

The card is kept here under your registration number, so you cannot lose it. The punches belong to the bike rather than to you, so if you sell it the new owner inherits them. Payment is at the bench, in cash or by transfer, and nothing is taken on this website.